What does it mean to be you?

Existing is actually scary and kind of confusing. Let's start from the beginning. You were born in a strange place called Earth, slowly you get your consciousness and then you start to notice the world around you. You can see that you share the land with other beings. You could kill some and there are also some that could kill you. The days have a bright yellow ball in a pale blue sky to warm your body and the nights are darker with a spectacular array of twinkling lights. All these should definitely be made for you. Someone has to be watching over you. God maybe? This is your home.

But it’s not just you on this planet. So, let us zoom out and see a bigger picture. Our humanity just crossed the 8 billion mark of our population growth. That means you're just one tiny little person out of that 8 billion. Those lights in the sky are not shining for you. They are just piles of balled up gasses that are light years away and just happen to be bright enough. Then you say to yourself, being alive in and of itself is special enough. But you are just made of many tiny little dead things like atoms and molecules. But at the same time, a bunch of dice are rolled for you every day. One day you’ll get a bad number, and your life ends that day. Then what happens? All your tiny little dead things stop working for you to keep you alive, all your biological processes start to break down and then you just stop being you. Even if you live up to a hundred, it's still nothing compared to 13.7 billion years of the universe. So, what’s the point of all this?

You are just a human, on an average planet, revolving around an average sized star in some corner of an average galaxy, which is part of a galaxy group. That galaxy group is one in thousands that make up our supercluster. That supercluster is one in thousands that make up our observable universe. The entire universe might be a million times bigger, but we will never know. It seems as though you became self-aware enough only to realize that the story is not about you. Everyone has their own way to look at their lives and have a unique experience of existential dread. These last few minutes of this reading probably haven't helped you either.

These thoughts are not uncommon. I have heard many people that I know that wonder the same. That means, these are not some isolated incidents that only happens to very few of us. It is becoming quite popular among individuals regardless of their age. I have a small idea to counter-act this very predicament that we put ourselves in. Please take it with a grain of salt. I know about life only as much as you do.

It is easy to think "Why bother?" once we start to realize that nothing else matters in the end. If nothing else matters in the end, we might as well make the best of what we have, set our own principles, goals, way of living and lead a fulfilling life on our own terms. It's easy to see ourselves detached from the universe, but that's not true. Although we are miniscule compared to pretty much everything we know about the universe, for some reason we are still part of it. If the universe doesn't show us what our purpose is, then we get to dictate what our purpose is. We still cannot be sure that our purpose in this universe is already etched on some stone or it is something you find along the way or if it really matters. Yes, we are going to cease to exist at some point. But before we do, we get to experience ourselves and the world around us. We get to experience feelings, emotions, sun rises, beautiful night sky (even if we have to drive miles just to see some stars), books, being with and helping each other and so much more.

We don’t have to be so much focused on the big picture. Because there is no big picture. There’s just you and your perspective of the world. The fact that we are able to think about these things is already kind of incredible. Wrapping up, you have used up a good amount of the time available to you. If this is your one shot at this life, there is no reason not to have fun and live happy as possible. Do the things that make you feel good. You get to decide what does it mean to be you. And as always, thanks for reading.